On my own

As I sit here writing I am officially on my own with my three babies (day 2). Mom left Sunday and we had the most incredible time with her. It was the hugest blessing having her here and quite honestly don't know how I would have done it without her. Yesterday (Monday) was quite tough and emotional. I never did get ahold of myself until later in the evening. I sort of felt like my emotions were under attack if that makes sense. I was so used to everything running smoothly and things just getting and being done every step of the way for a month. I appreciated everything mom was doing and knew she was doing alot, but until I was on my own I didn't realize just how much and really didn't mentally prepare like I would normally do. Every i was dotted and t was crossed and she did more than I would do. Dishes would just get done. Beds were always made, kids were always dressed first thing, laundry was always caught up. A great big thank you to you mom for all you did while you were here!! It probably didn't help either that Laura had an off night and didn't settle very well after each feeding like normal so Monday hits and she was extra irritable and I was so tired I was borderline hallucinating. I tried to start the day normal trying to do it all and tried to take a shower while the two big kids were in the playroom which is normally no big deal. All of a sudden Bradley runs in and tells me Alayna was in the fridge and peed all over the kitchen floor so I find myself rushing down cleaning up pee and crying at the same time which in turn made Alayna cry. The baby was screaming too. Alayna then sort of stops crying and says to me "don't cry mommy, why you cry mommy...it's ok baby girl she says, do you want my nuky?" I cry harder and by this time Bradley is discusted and says, "why am I the only one not crying?" Things like this don't normally make me cry, so I knew it was fatigue and hormones totally out of wack, but it still didn't help me reason with it. Sue calls in the mix of it all and that sweet friend immediately says "I'm on my way!!!" She comes to the rescue and starts buzzing around like a little bumblebee and makes us lunch, makes me laugh, cleans up lunch, makes me laugh more and then puts Alayna down for a nap and then takes Bradley home with her so I can take a nap, Wow!! She just left it all to come to my aid. A great big thank you to her for helping me on my first day alone. Today has gone so much better and today I'm a good kind of tired if there is such a thing. In other words, I feel more like myself. I'm sure this week in general will be the hardest until we get back in the groove of "normal life" As John and Kate say..."It's a crazy life, but it's our life" So Craig and I have adopted that saying for ourselves.